


Plato's Gift

by Djinn



Category: Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-05
Updated: 2017-09-05
Packaged: 2018-12-24 10:12:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,660
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12010569
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Djinn/pseuds/Djinn
Summary: There are some unexpected aftereffects from the run-in with the Platonians.    (This is another old one I found I hadn't posted.  One of the first Kirk/Chapel fics I did.)





	Plato's Gift

Kirk could still smell the heavy cologne the Platonians had doused him with, the cologne that no amount of scrubbing could get rid of entirely. He rubbed his forehead, and his temples throbbed. His head was killing him—a kironide aftereffect coupled with sensory overload from his encounter with _Eau d'Tacky for Men_. 

He glanced over at Uhura. She was busy at her board, keying in the warning message for the communications buoy he had set into orbit around Platonius. 

She turned to look at him, her eyes mischievous enough to make him wonder what exactly she'd put in the message. "All set, sir." She turned back to the board.

She didn't seem to be demonstrating any lingering trauma—or attachment—from the little show Parmen had forced them to put on. He should have known she'd be fine. Uhura was much tougher than she looked. And not one to misconstrue what that kiss had meant. 

He glanced at Spock; he seemed the same as always. He seemed to feel Kirk's eyes on him and looked over. 

"You have a headache?"

"I do not." 

"Good Vulcan genes, I guess."

He nodded and went back to whatever he was doing at the science station.

"Well, I for one am sick of this place. Let's get the hell out of here. Mister Sulu, ahead warp six."

"Ahead warp six. Aye, sir."

"I'll be in sickbay," he said as he pushed himself out of his chair with a little too much gusto. His head throbbed even worse. "I've got a headache the size of Parmen's ego."

Uhura smiled. "My condolences."

He nodded carefully, unwilling to set the pain in motion again. He stepped into the turbolift and rode it down to sickbay. McCoy's office was dark; in fact, the main sickbay ward was darkened so that the few patients could sleep. He saw a light on in Chapel's space and walked over softly. 

She was staring at her terminal, lost in what looked to be research.

"Miss Chapel?"

She looked up startled. "Sir. I'm sorry. I didn't know you were there." She turned to face him. "What can I do for you?"

"Can you get rid of this damned cologne?"

She looked immediately sympathetic. "If I could, I wouldn't still be wearing mine. I call it _I'm-a-Big-Slut Number Five_. Sure to be a hit on Orion."

He laughed. "I can't even smell it." It was a lie. He could smell it, just as he could smell Uhura's on the bridge. Neither smelled good. But they didn't need to know that. "All I can smell is my own and it's giving me a headache."

She stood. "That I can help you with." She led him out to a diagnostic bed and ran the scanner over him. "Part of the pain is a reaction to the kironide. I know you were desperate, but it was dangerous to inject it without testing it first."

He nodded. "Has Spock been complaining?"

She shot him a look. "I really wouldn't know, Captain."

"He hasn't stopped by? To see how you are?"

She shot him an even darker look. "No." She filled a hypospray with one compound then asked, "Are you going back to the bridge?"

"A captain's work is never done." He scratched at his arm.

"Then I can't give you the good stuff." She pulled down another bottle from the cabinet. "But this should do the trick for now. Come back when you're done with your shift if it's still hurting, and I'll give you something stronger." She laid the hypospray against his neck, the metal cool against his skin. 

He closed his eyes at the sensation. 

She pulled it away. "You're all set."

"Okay." He scratched at the other arm; the itch seemed to start back up as soon as he took his fingers away.

"Let me see that." She gently pulled his hand away. "Hives. Don't scratch." She scanned him. "You're having some kind of systemic reaction. I'm going to do a full work up." She fiddled with her instruments for a moment, batting away the hand he brought up to scratch. Then she reached for another hypo. "This should help the itching."

Again the hypo felt cool against his strangely sensitive skin. "I'm all right for duty?"

"As far as I can tell from this. If I find anything in my analysis, you'll be the first to know." She looked down at his arm, where more red welts stood out. "Maybe you shouldn't go back to the bridge."

He hopped down from the table. "Shift's almost over. I'll be fine."

She nodded but didn't look convinced. "Damn Platonians." Her tone was bitter.

"Do you need to talk about it?"

"What? About being humiliated in front of a jeering crowd. Of nearly being burned." She held a hand to her cheek, her voice dropped, became distant. "I could feel the heat coming off that poker. Even from that far away. I kept thinking, 'This can't be happening.' But it was happening." She seemed to come back to the present, smiled lightly. "You kept it from happening. I owe you."

He sat down across from her. "Part of the job."

She grinned. "Of hero?"

He nodded.

"You do it well. Keep doing it." Her look darkened. "Next time do it before they bring me down for the floor show."

"I'll try."

There was an uncomfortable silence, then he said, "I know you have feelings for Spock. What happened down there couldn't have helped."

"Oh, I don't know. I found out he's not much of a kisser." The joke fell flat and she looked away. 

He waited.

She shook her head in a way that let him know the discussion was over. "I need to analyze this, sir. And you have a ship to steer."

He grinned. "Actually that's Sulu's job."

She laughed. "Whatever. Go be captain, Captain."

"Aye-aye, Nurse." He grinned.

She grinned back and the expression made her look younger, softer somehow. He stood quickly and headed for the bridge. As he walked down the corridor, he felt a wave of dizziness and stopped, putting his hand out against the bulkhead to steady himself.

"Sir? Are you all right?" a crewman asked.

He straightened. "Fine. Just a tough landing party." 

He smiled at the crewman, recognized him as Taveris, recently assigned to the ship. This was his first posting. "Enjoying yourself so far, Taveris?"

The crewman beamed. "Oh, yes, sir!" His enthusiasm was contagious. 

Kirk grinned. "Glad to hear it." He waved Taveris on, then continued to the turbolift. The trip to the bridge was no longer than normal, yet he felt a surge of panic, as if the doors were never going to open. The walls felt as if they were closing in on him. He nearly ran out of the lift when it arrived on the bridge.

Uhura shot a startled look at him. He took a deep breath and slowly walked to his chair, sitting down gratefully. Nothing was wrong. Nothing was wrong. It was a hugely ineffective mantra. Something was very wrong. He felt a flush and his arm itched again. He could fill the tingle of sweat at his temples, but he hadn't moved from his chair. He sat quietly, trying to ignore the strange intense feeling that was shooting through him. A feeling that seemed to be centered in his groin.

He fought the need to get up and pace. He took a deep breath, and it came out nearly as a pant. He had to get off the bridge. But how much should he say to his officers?

"Chapel to Captain Kirk."

He practically leapt for the comm button on his chair. "Kirk here."

"Sir, I've found something you might want to see."

"On my way." He stood up too quickly, his head swam, and he grasped the chair.

"Sir?" Uhura was on her feet, a worried look on her face.

"I'm all right. Just a bad reaction to that kironide." He shot her his trademark grin. "I'll see you next shift. Spock, you have the conn."

Spock turned to look at him. "Aye, sir." He looked at Uhura, nodded toward Kirk as if telling her to help him.

She walked toward him, and Kirk caught a whiff of her perfume. It smelled nice. That was not a good sign. He waved her away with a strangled, "As you were, Lieutenant," and hurried off the bridge. 

The turbolift seemed even smaller this time. He closed his eyes and counted to ten as the lift slowed and finally opened and he rushed out, practically running to sickbay. 

Chapel looked up at him as he stumbled in too quickly, nearly crashing into her the door. She shook her head as she steered him into her chair.

Her perfume smelled intoxicating. He leaned in and took a deeper whiff.

She pushed him away. "This is worse than I thought."

"What...the hell...is going on." He scratched at his arm.

She shot him with another hypo. "This should stop the itch." She gave him a strange smile.

He shook his head and scratched again.

"Not right this minute. Give it time to work." She pulled his hand away.

He stared down at her hands. Her skin was so soft, the fingers tapered and strong. He looked up at her. He'd never realized how blue her eyes were. Or how nice her legs were. As nice as Janice's had been. He smiled.

Chapel knelt down. "Captain Kirk, we need to get you to your quarters."

He smiled. "Why are you talking to me like I'm drunk? I'm perfectly fine." He reached out and stroked her cheek.

"Perfectly. Right." She pulled him up, grabbed her scanner, and pushed him gently out the door. 

He nodded and walked carefully down the corridor. "I can get home on my own, Chapel." 

A pretty young ensign walked past and he turned and followed her. Chapel's grip on his arm brought him up short. 

"Your quarters are this way, Casanova."

"You're out of line, Chris." He smiled. Chris. It was a nice name. He didn't call her that very often. He turned to look at her. "Spock should have checked on you."

"Yes, sir." She herded him into a lift, then back out when they hit his deck. "Just ahead, sir."

He smiled. His dizziness faded and he walked with more assurance. He felt good, really good. He palmed the door open, gestured for her to precede him. "So, are you going to tell me what is going on? I'm most certainly not myself."

"It's that damned kironide." She locked the door. "You were fools to use it, even if it did save us all."

"Don't sugarcoat it, Chris." He grinned. 

"Kironide is processed by the pituitary gland."

He nodded. "I know. That's why Alexander couldn't use it. His pituitary doesn't work right. It's why he's so short."

"That's right. Lack of growth hormone." She sat down on his couch and pointed to a chair very far from her. "Sit."

He deliberately sat next to her. She really did smell great. He scooted closer.

She moved away and began to scan him, frowning at the readings. "I thought that injection would help."

"It did. My arms don't itch anymore." He looked down at them; the angry red welts were gone. "Look, no hives."

"That wasn't exactly the itch I meant." She held out the scanner. "Can you read this?"

He saw a lot of funny lines, all heading upward. "Something looks elevated. I take it that's not good." The intense feeling was coursing through him again and he found himself mesmerized by the way her uniform clung to her breasts. 

"This is FSH, this one is LH. That kironide you injected caused your pituitary to overmanufacture these hormones. Do you know what they do?"

He shook his head.

"Regulate desire for one thing." She got up, moved away. "Sexual desire."

He couldn't take his eyes off her. "So your diagnosis is that I'm horny?"

"To put it mildly, yes." 

He fought the feelings that were coursing through him. He could control himself. "You have a cure?"

She moved over to him and scanned him again. "The levels are dropping very slowly, so it doesn't seem like a permanent condition." 

He was excruciatingly aware of how close she was standing. He reached for a pillow, put it over his lap. "Good." He moved uncomfortably. "This is embarrassing as hell."

She sat down. "It could be hours."

"I'll just pretend I'm a teenager again."

She smiled tentatively. "I think the levels would fall more quickly if you were to ummm..." She made a fist and pretended to stroke—a hand signal he never thought he'd get from a member of his crew. Much less as a suggested course of treatment.

He looked at her sharply. She was blushing furiously.

"That's your clinical opinion? That I should—" God damn it, he was not doing to say "masturbate" to her.

She met his eyes. "I think it would help."

Now it was his turn to blush. "Okay, then. When you're gone. I'll...you know."

"Just let me check this again." She leaned in, giving him a nice view down her dress, and he worked hard to force his eyes up and away. "Were you just looking at my boobs?" When he didn't answer, she looked up and grinned. "I'm asking for science."

"Yes."

"Your levels reacted." She inched closer. "I think it might be...better with someone?"

Hell, yes, he wanted to say. Instead, he just shrugged—he was not going to drag her into this.

She looked away as if considering, then she turned back and slowly reached over and took his hand. 

"Chris, no." He tried to pull away, but not with much conviction.

"You were kind to me when we found Roger. You were careful with his reputation when it was all over. I've never forgotten that."

He smiled gently. "It wasn't how I wanted that to go for you."

"No. Me neither." She slowly twined her fingers with his.

He gasped. It was like being a teenager again. The least little movement of hers, the smallest touch, and he was completely focused on that part of her body. He reached down and slid his other hand down her leg, which she pressed firmly against his. 

She sucked in breath, then she licked her lips. He stared at where her tongue had been, mesmerized by the thought of it touching him.

"And you did save me from whatever Parmen had planned with that poker." She met his eyes fearlessly. 

"Chris. I can't give you anything beyond tonight."

"I know."

"But it should mean something." He brushed back a tendril of hair. "I like you."

"I like you, too. And it will mean something. It'll mean thanks." She gently moved the pillow off his lap; her hand took its place. "You can't tell me that you don't want me."

He closed his eyes. "No, I guess I can't." 

Her grasp grew firmer. "I tend to be an empirical scientist, Jim. I like to observe reactions." She looked up at him suddenly. "I can call you Jim?"

"I think at this point it's required."

She laughed, and he was very grateful for the genuineness of her smile, for the way her eyes sparkled as she leaned in to kiss him. Her lips were incredibly soft against his. He pulled her closer, felt her tongue run along his upper lip, sending shivers down his spine straight to where she was still holding him. 

"God," he moaned. 

He opened his mouth to her and felt her tongue meet his. His body surged with desire and he began to open her uniform. Then he stopped. "You're still on duty?"

She shook her head. "Nurse Kimble was nice enough to relieve me."

"I should give her a medal." He gently pulled away from her enough to stand. "You don't have to do this, Chris."

"I know." She stood and took his hand when he held it out. He led her into the bedroom, was suddenly in no mood to rush despite the surging hormones telling him to hurry and take her. 

She began to undo his uniform and he realized her hands were shaking. "Chris?" 

She smiled as if embarrassed. "It's been a while." She looked away. "Can you forget how to do it?"

He pulled her close, kissed her again, and wondered if she had any idea how she felt in his arms, how good her body felt pressed against his. "I don't think you can," he whispered as he pulled the last of her clothes off.

She eased back onto the bed, her eyes locked with his as he followed her. He kissed her lazily, holding her close, one hand tangled in her hair. Then he pushed her down and began to roam, learning the rise and fall of her body with his mouth, his hands, his tongue. She arched and groaned and he lost himself in the musky scent of her. Holding her down as she bucked beneath him, he memorized the way she moved, how warm her belly became where his hand lay over it, how red her chest was when she finally lay still. 

He eased himself up. "See. You didn't forget how."

She grinned and pushed him over onto his back. "Let's see what else I remember." 

Her hand found him again, squeezing and stroking, the torture exquisite. Her mouth captured him, her hand holding him more firmly, and he moaned, his toes curling and his hands digging into the bedspread as she pleasured him. "Oh, God, Chris." 

He was close, too close. "Chris, if you don't stop—"

Her hand on his lips stopped his warning, the other hand tightened around him and he gave himself over to her warm sweet mouth, to her tongue running over and around him. He was not quiet when he came.

She looked up at him and began to laugh. "I hope these walls are soundproof."

He pulled her up to him. "I think they are."

"They better be, or your neighbors will call security on me."

"I'll defend you to the death."

Her smile was so tender that he felt something in his chest tighten, something that had little to do with the hormones that were sweeping over him again.

"I hope you didn't expect to get any sleep, Chris."

She shrugged. "Just one of the sacrifices a nurse has to make when caring for a patient."

He kissed her, slowly, tasting himself on her, knowing she was tasting herself on him. The thought made him want her even more. "Please tell me you don't care for all your patients that way."

"No, you're the first."

"Good." He grinned. "You didn't forget that part either." He pushed her to her back, moved over her. "In fact, I'd give you excellent marks." He slowly pushed into her, then groaned as she gripped him, strong muscles holding him like a third hand. Tight, warm. God, it was heaven. 

She was watching his face intently. "I told you, it's been a while."

"Is it bad of me to say I'm glad?" 

He kissed her when she laughed. 

Kirk gave himself over to the motion they were learning together, to the sensation of being captured within her. She wrapped her legs around him, clamped down again, and he groaned loudly. 

"Here comes security," he whispered.

Her giggle was the sweetest thing he'd ever heard. Spock had no idea what he was missing.

##

Chapel woke slowly, her back pressed against Jim's chest. She smiled as she felt his arm tighten around her. Then she yawned noisily. 

"What? A half hour nap isn't enough for you?" His voice in her ear was gently amused.

She turned, cuddling in against him. She hadn't expected being with him to be quite this comfortable. Had expected it to be hot...but not warm. 

"Good morning," he said, kissing her softly.

"Good morning." 

His hand was moving lower and she moaned, then she tried to pull away. "I thought the levels would be down by now. Let me get the scanner."

He held her where she was. "They are down. I'm fine. This is just for us." He kissed her again. "In the time we have left."

She didn't even try to resist him. Pulled him down to her, giving in to his relentless lips, his gentle touch. She moaned and could feel him smile as he kissed her. 

"Am I getting to you?"

"As if you don't know the answer to that?" She leaned back and arched as his fingers moved faster, harder. Every inch of her ached from the unexpected pleasure of the night they'd just spent together. It was the best pain in the world. She cried out, clutching and moving and finally laying still.

He stroked her hair off her face. She rolled over and kissed him hard, a strange passion filling her, a kind of desperation. She knew that they couldn't be together, but she didn't want this to end. She crawled on top of him, settled on him with an ease that she wouldn't have believed the night before. 

He smiled as he watched her ride him, his hand grasping hers, holding her as she arched and controlled him. Then his smile faded, turning to a look much more intense as he thrust over and over, finally crying out and pulling her down to him as he shuddered.

She relaxed against him, kissing his chest as he stroked her hair. His arms tightened around her.

"It's going to be damned hard to see you in sickbay, Chris, and not remember this. Not want it back." His tone was more serious than it had been all night.

"I know." She burrowed her cheek against his chest. "But..." She couldn't say it, couldn't put her plans, the plans she'd told no one about, into words.

"But what?" His touch on her was gentle, sweet.

"I'm thinking about going to med school." She pushed up so she could see her face. "It's what I want to do. What I need to do."

He nodded, his look full of tender understanding. "It's what you should do, then. You'll be a great doctor." He grinned. "Just look at your bedside manner. Although I'm not sure it's still bedside if you're in the bed?"

She laughed. "I don't think it is." Her smile faded.

He sighed softly. "When?"

"The interview is in a month, when I'm back on Earth for leave. There's a test if I get through the interview session. That's what I was studying for when you came in. If I pass, I'll come back to the ship until school starts a few months later." She looked down. "I guess I need to tell Len."

"Yes, you should. If you need a reference, I'll be happy to be one."

"Thanks." 

She rolled off of him and was about to get up, but he grabbed her and pulled her back. 

"Jim, it's time to get up."

His breath in her ear made her shiver. "A few more minutes." 

She settled against him, sighing as his arm came around to hold her close. "It's not fair." She immediately wished she hadn't said that. He'd misunderstand.

But he didn't. "No, it's not fair, is it?" He tipped her chin up and kissed her with a heartbreaking mixture of passion and desperation. "But life rarely is. Sometimes the best we can do is squeeze out a few perfect moments."

"I guess."

He suddenly grinned. "And if you're not on the ship, then you won't be one of my crew. That might not be a bad thing."

"No, it might not be." She kissed him, losing herself in the feeling of his skin on hers. 

His comm unit sounded. "Bridge to Kirk."

Chapel started to giggle. "Busted."

Kirk glared at her and choked back a laugh of his own as he reached for the button by his bed and said, "Kirk here."

"Priority message for you, sir."

"I'll take it in here." 

Chapel rolled out of bed and tugged her uniform on, when it was clear the comm channel was cut, she said, "That's my cue,"

He pulled a robe on, then pulled her to him for a quick kiss. "Thank you."

"My pleasure." She grinned.

"And mine." 

She hurried out of his room and managed to get out of the immediate vicinity of his quarters without being seen. Allowing herself to relax, she suddenly realized that she hadn't checked her hair. She reached up, patting down what had to be the worst case of bed head ever. "Oh, shit," she said under her breath.

"Miss Chapel?"

She turned, trying to hide the back of her head from Spock. "Sir?"

He looked surprised at her formality. "I stopped by sickbay last night to check on you, but Nurse Kimble said you had already gone." He looked concerned. "I stopped by your quarters. Several times. You did not sleep there last night?" It was an unusually intrusive question from the Vulcan.

Chapel looked down at his forearms. They were scratched raw. 

Hiding a smile, she said, "No. I didn't sleep there last night, Mister Spock." She turned to go. 

"Christine?"

She turned back and shot him a questioning look. He never called her by her first name if he could help it.

"Would you care to have dinner with me tonight?"

She smiled gently. The man she'd wanted for so long had finally asked her out. Too bad for him that he'd waited until the one day when he could only come in second best. "I don't think that's wise, sir. But I appreciate the offer." She pointed at his arms. "Stop by sickbay later. I'll give you something for that."

He stared at her, his look slightly perplexed.

She took pity on him. "I'm thinking of going to med school, Spock. Would you be willing to give me a reference?"

She saw him process the implications of her statement. He nodded gravely. "You will be an excellent doctor. And I would be honored to recommend you to Starfleet Medical."

This was one hell of a strange morning. "Great. Thanks. I'll see you around."

He nodded, and she turned and fled, feeling as if his eyes were burning into her back the whole way down the corridor. She turned gratefully into the turbolift, rode it down one deck to her quarters. They seemed very quiet, very cold after the warmth of Jim's bed. She forced herself to let that thought go. She had work to do, and a friend to tell that she was leaving. McCoy shouldn't hear that from Kirk or Spock. She showered, then dressed and hurried down to sickbay.

McCoy looked up as she stood in his office doorway. "You're not on duty for a few hours."

She nodded. It should not be this hard to tell him. "I want to ask you a favor."

"Shoot." He smiled up at her.

"I want to go to med school. And I want your blessing."

"My blessing? For crying out loud, I've only been telling you to do this for the last year. It's about damn time." He sat back, a look of supreme satisfaction on his face. "When's your interview?"

"Next month."

He turned to his terminal, began calling up files and sending them to her. "Then you have a lot of prepping to do. If they like you, they'll make you take the aptitude test. And of course, they're going to like you." 

She walked over to him, leaned down and hugged him tightly. "I love you."

He patted her arms where they folded around his chest. "Ah, darlin', you know that I love you too. Now get to studying."

"Right."

She turned around and walked out of his office, a happy grin on her face. Then her grin grew. Kirk stood in the sickbay doorway. He held up the scanner. 

She walked down to him, aware that she was moving her hips in a manner far more suggestive than she normally would have done around him. "Sir."

His smile was perfectly proper yet it still sent a shiver down her spine. "You forgot this."

She held out her hand and he dropped it in her palm. She closed her fingers around the scanner, never breaking her gaze.

"When did you say you'd be starting med school?" He grinned at her, then he headed down the hall to McCoy's office. 

She heard McCoy say, "Just a minute, Jim. I have to grab my stuff if we're going down to the planet." He bustled past Kirk, into the main sickbay area.

Kirk turned, stared at her. His expression was unreadable; he didn't look away. She didn't look away, either. 

Finally, McCoy came back. "Okay, let's go."

The jovial captain was back immediately. He smiled and followed McCoy out. 

As he passed her, she said, "Safe trip."

"Goodbye, Chris," he said, the smile in his eyes changing to a look full of want, a look that was quickly pushed away. 

"Goodbye," she whispered, then turned back to her office to start studying. It took her a long time to stop thinking of the very recent past and concentrate on her future.

 

_Epilogue_

Her goodbye party was in full swing. Actually it was long past full swing and was definitely into the running on empty stage. Chapel felt arms grab her, was swung into yet another crewman's embrace. She was suddenly much too aware of soggy lips and an overly aggressive tongue. She pushed hard and finally worked her way free. 

She didn't recognize the lieutenant who was holding her. 

"I will miss you so much," he said, trying to pull her back to him.

A hand came down on his arm. "I think Miss Chapel's gotten the message, Ensign."

"It's lieutenant, Captain."

Kirk's grin was a bit dangerous. "Yes. If you stop now, it is."

Her admirer nodded quickly. "Right, sir. I'll be going now."

She smiled at Kirk once the lieutenant was gone. He laughed and gave her his trademark shrug and grin. His hand stole out and touched hers.

"And how much have you had to drink?" she asked.

"I'm perfectly sober." He laughed again.

"Right. That's why you felt compelled to defend my honor." She moved a little closer.

"Somebody had to. And it is my ship." He smiled. "And fortunately you won't be on it much longer." He frowned. "That came out wrong." 

She nodded. "Major deductions for the dismount, Jim." She shook her head. "So I take it you're looking forward to not being my C.O.?"

The look he gave her was scorching. 

She smiled. "And when is your next leave?" She moved a little closer.

"Two months, three weeks, four days." His smile grew. "And five hours give or take."

She laughed. "Not eager or anything." 

"Not at all." He took her arm and moved her toward the viewport. "So much has happened since Platonius."

She nodded. Her life was finally on track; she was really going away to med school. And it was an added treat to have him interested in her, to know that he cared. She'd wondered, after their night together—their one night together. He'd kept his distance...from her. From what McCoy had said, Jim had fallen hard for that android woman during the Rigellian Fever outbreak. And then Lester had taken his body. Chapel had felt like an idiot that she'd just bought Lester's story, that she hadn't even tried to find out if the woman who'd been held prisoner in sickbay remembered that night. It would have been so simple. 

Of course, he hadn't thought to ask for her help either. He'd been so sure only Spock could rescue him.

He seemed to be reading her mind. "If I'm ever in someone else's body again, I promise to turn to you for help."

She smiled. "Ditto."

"Whose body do you plan to be in?"

"Very funny." 

He laughed. "I'm going to miss you."

"Yes, because we've spent so much time together since that night." She winced. Her words had come out much harsher than she'd intended.

"You know why."

She sighed. "I do. I'm sorry." She looked out at the stars. "I'll miss this. No more starstream."

"Nope." He touched the viewport, ran his finger down, as if tracing a pattern of stars. "I can't imagine giving this up."

"I can't imagine you on the ground." She laughed softly. "Well, maybe for a few days...or longer."

He smiled. "At your place?"

She nodded. Turning, she saw that the party had moved away from them, as if giving them some privacy. She laughed softly. "They think this is the talk."

"The talk?"

"The one you give everyone who goes away. About what an honor it's been serving with them and how they're the heart of what makes this ship great."

He laughed. "Am I that predictable?"

She nodded. "It's a legend, the talk is. Just like you." She smiled. "It's a good thing. People want the talk."

"I'll take your word for it. I'm assuming I don't have to give it to you since you seem to know it word for word."

She nodded.

"And for the record, I do tailor it to the person."

She smiled contritely. She'd hit a bit of a nerve. "I know you do." She looked down. "I'm sorry."

"What for?"

"For being sharp and edgy." She made a face. "I'm just feeling strange. Excited but a little adrift. And I wish..." 

"I know. I do, too." He touched her arm gently. 

"Wanting it this bad now will just build character, right?"

He nodded. "Although I'm fine with the amount of character you already have."

She laughed out loud, then wondered how many heads turned at the sound.

He grinned. "And don't worry, you'll do great at med school." He glanced over his shoulder. "You have friends who want to say goodbye. As long as I monopolize you, they won't."

She nodded. "I'll see you in two months..."

"Three weeks, four days. And five hours."

"Give or take." She smiled. 

He pulled her to him, it probably looked like nothing more than an impromptu hug for a longtime member of his crew. "I can't wait." 

"Me, either," she whispered.

She felt his lips come down half on her hair, half on her ear, then he let her go and turned away. He worked his way around the room, talking to everyone. But she had the feeling he was keeping watch for more sloppy goodbye kisses.

There weren't any, but there were lots of hugs, and kisses on the cheek. Even Spock touched her hand briefly, and she smiled at him. She was glad to be finally free of the crush, knew he was probably even gladder, despite the fact that he'd sought her out after the Platonians. Too bad she'd been otherwise engaged.

Uhura and Sulu helped carry her goodbye gifts to her quarters. They stayed for a while, reminiscing with her while she packed the mementos safely away. Finally, they got up. 

"Don't say goodbye. I don't want to hear it." Uhura pulled her close. "I don't know what I'm going to do without you."

"Me either, Ny."

Sulu gave her a quick hug. "Good luck, Chris."

She nodded and touched his cheek for a moment. He was so solid, so goodhearted.

The room seemed very quiet as she puttered around in it. Soon there was nothing left but the things she needed for the night. She could pack them in the morning. 

She took a deep breath. She was really doing this. She was leaving.

She felt panic come over her. Good lord, what was she doing? 

She forced the panic away. This was what she wanted. She moved toward the bed, was about to call for lights out when her chime buzzed.

Wrapping her robe around her, she moved to the door.

It was Kirk. She moved back without a thought and he ducked in, not hiding...exactly. 

"What's wrong?" she asked.

He walked past her, into the room. "I didn't like that last goodbye. Something was missing."

She moved toward him. "It was?"

He nodded.

She stopped, just out of reach. "So, you intend to remedy that?"

He closed the gap between them. "I do."

She could feel a huge grin starting.

"I take it you don't object?" he asked.

"Not at all." 

His grin was pretty damn huge too. He pulled her to him and kissed her the way she remembered from their night—so long ago that night had been. Ages. Decades. Eons.

He pulled away. Sighing as he touched her hair. "I will miss you. I know I've avoided you. It was just...too difficult. If it had just been sex..."

She felt a tug somewhere near her stomach. It hadn't just been sex for her, either. She hadn't been able to get that night out of her mind. Even after Lester, when he'd finally let her in a little, she'd thought that she might be making too much out of this. 

He seemed to be waiting for her to say something. She saw disappointment fill his eyes and realized he wasn't sure about her, about what she was feeling. 

It touched her and was the last thing she expected. "It wasn't for me, either."

The disappointment faded. "No?" He smiled as he began to untie her robe.

"Not at all." She kissed him again. "We connected. I don't normally feel that comfortable with someone."

He pushed the robe off her shoulders. Her nightgown followed it to the floor. "I know."

She looked down at the pooled fabric, then back up at him. "I seem to be naked."

He laughed. "Yes, you do. How did that happen?"

"Beats me. This really cute guy came in to say goodbye and the next thing you know..."

"Happens a lot to you, does it?"

"Only when I leave. Only when it's you." She rubbed up against him. "Why am I naked, by the way?"

"Well, if you have to ask..." He pretended to walk away, laughed as she caught him and pulled him back. "When I said I couldn't wait, I meant it."

She smiled. "When I said I couldn't either, I meant it, too." She made short work of his uniform.

"Better?" he asked with a smile.

"Much."

"Well, we're both naked. What now?" He was pushing her back to the bed, even as he teased her.

"I'm not sure. Did you want to play chess?"

He shook his head.

"Watch a vid?"

His mouth was roaming all over her body.

She moaned. "No, I'm guessing vids are out."

He looked up at her. "Sometimes they're fun."

She laughed as she pulled him up to her, lost herself in kissing him. God, it really was this good. She hadn't made it better in her imagination. 

He pulled away and stared down at her, his look thoughtful, and a little bit sad. "I will miss you. And I have thought about this." He ran his hand down her side, causing her to shiver as he hit a ticklish place. "More than you'll ever know."

She lay still and let herself just look at him. She hadn't done that. She hadn't gone out of her way to avoid running into him as he'd seemed to do with her, but she also hadn't let herself really look at him since that night. It had been too hard. "I can imagine. I know how much I've thought about it."

He smiled gently, tracing her cheekbone then down her neck, staring at her until she had to look away. No one had ever watched her the way he was. She could tell he wasn't just looking, he was seeing. All of her. More of her than she normally showed anyone.

She captured his hand. "We're naked and I'm leaving in the morning. You sure you want to waste time staring at me?" She smiled gently. 

"No time with you is a waste."

"Oh. That's so nice." She pulled him down and kissed him fiercely. She let herself go, let herself relax, trusting that he wouldn't hurt her now just like he hadn't hurt her the first time. Then she realized that was the wrong way to think about it. With him, she should think about what he would do, not what he wouldn't.

With him, she had a future. It was an odd feeling.

She almost started to panic. Then she remembered that he'd still be on the ship. They could ease into this. She didn't have to make the adjustment to actually being happy all at once. 

She giggled at how stupid that thought was.

He pulled away, gave her a funny look. "You all right?"

"I'm happy." She thought he'd have no idea what a revelation that was.

But his eyes were full of understanding. "I know. Feels strange, doesn't it?" He moved over her, into her, smiled as she arched up under him. As he moved, he whispered, "I'm happy too, Chris."

She dug her fingers into his back, trying to let him know just how much she'd missed him. How lonely her nights had been since the one they'd spent together. She didn't know if his had been as lonely, didn't care anymore. Despite his reputation, she had a feeling once Jim Kirk decided he was happy with someone, he wouldn't stray.

He rolled them and let her ride him, smiling as he watched her. He held her with one hand, touching her in places that made her crazy with the other. As she called out, she heard him whisper, "Chris."

Once she could breathe again, she moved against him. His eyes closed and his jaw clenched as he surrendered to her. Then he was calling out, and she watched him as he came down. She whispered his name.

He pulled her down to cuddle against him. His lips were lazy and sweet on her face as she lay pressed along his side.

His arms felt so good around her. So damned good. She wanted him, wanted this. 

But then she felt nervous again. Was she making too much of it? Was it more than sex but less than a commitment? 

"What are you thinking about?" he asked softly.

She shook her head. "Nothing."

"Yes, you are. You're frowning."

She nestled deeper into his arms, didn't look up as she said softly, "I'm making an assumption. It may be a foolish one."

He waited. Then he laughed softly. "Do I have to guess what it is?"

"No. I'm working up my nerve to tell you."

"Ah." He kissed her, moved her slightly so it was less of a stretch for them to kiss. His lips were soft, gentle. Loving. "Just how much nerve do you need to work up?"

"A lot." She smiled. "Okay. I'm ready." She took a deep breath. "What is this?"

"Define this."

"You and me." She held up her hand. "This is coming out all wrong. Look, just tell me straight. We're good together and it's not just sex, but do you intend for me to think that it's exclusive? Because you're on the ship and I'll be on Earth, and...well...you're human and I can't really expect that you—"

He kissed her. When he finally pulled away, he laughed. "You're an idiot."

"Okay. Not the response I expected, but you're certainly entitled to your opinion."

He laughed again. Kissed her harder. "Is not exclusive what you want? Or just what you think I want?"

"The second one."

"Oh." He sighed. 

They lay in silence for a long moment.

Then he said, "I'm not in love with you."

She laughed, and the sound of her laugh was too bitter. She tried for a smile. It shook. "I know."

"Let me finish." He touched her lips and smiled a bit sadly as they trembled under his finger. 

She tried to make them stop. Couldn't.

He kissed her again. This time the kiss was so tender she almost cried. "I'm not in love with you...yet." He kissed her again, didn't stop until they were both out of breath.

She smiled.

"I like the idea of exclusive," he said softly. "I don't want to share."

"It's not just you sharing me that's involved in that exclusive thing, you know."

He pulled her leg up over his hip and eased closer, until they were one again. As she made happy sounds, he said softly, "I know that."

He moved faster, his hands far too many places—and making her moan. "Now, have we got that straightened out?"

She nodded.

"Good," he said, abandoning talk and focusing all his energy on her until her world exploded and he followed her into pleasure.

They lay still, and he brushed her hair back from her face. "I wanted to deck that lieutenant tonight if it helps reinforce the idea that we're together?" 

"It does actually." She shifted so she could cuddle in again. "You showed great restraint." 

"I thought so." He kissed her forehead. "Are you tired?"

She nodded. "Are you going to let me sleep?"

"I can."

"Do you want to?"

He laughed. "No." 

She smiled, the smile turned into a yawn. 

"Go to sleep. I'll wake you up if I can't stand it."

She shook her head. "I don't want to waste this chance to connect."

"We can connect other ways." He kissed her gently. "Go to sleep."

She kissed him back and wondered if she would ever get tired of the feeling of his lips on hers. Then she settled back into his arms and fell asleep.

Until he woke her up.

Over and over and over again.

FIN


End file.
